December 4th 2019 , I woke up and decided it was about time I go for those morning walks my mum had been asking me to do for weeks. The baby was set for Christmas day and so I was lazy about the walks and living generally, I was tired, couldn’t sleep in the night because that’s when the little someone was actively booting and turning, the heart burn was up a notch and I had to literally sit up to change positions. Most nights I was sitting up eating ice imagining what motherhood was going to be.
This particular morning I was unusually energetic, probably because my Anty Vicky woke up at 4 am to pray for me to have a safe delivery. Saying words like “open her womb, oh Lord…recive strength….”
So am busy on my first morning Trek up a hill singing along to my music of the lords goodness running after me.
On my way down the hill, I feel a sharp pain and I pause. It stops almost immediately and my mind says “False labour”. I had been waiting for those as a sign of my for my forthcoming due date.
Because I had so much energy that morning I go ahead to lay my mums bed , since for reasons I don’t remember I had moved into her space.
That’s when I got another contraction. It was so painful I was gripping the bed posts for support and as soon as it passed,I went Into panic mode crying running to my mum, in my coconut Head I expected her to take the pain away.
And then I got the lecture,“mums don’t cry, they are strong blah blah blah” and I was still crying like a baby.
My mind was all over the place. I was thinking of how to get out of this reality without going through the pain. I was scared. My pain tolerance was at Zero. Am the kid that overdoses painkillers to take away the suffering. Because of just one contraction, my life flashed before me.
The journey begins,
We don’t have a car and so we had to take bikes to the main road. On the way I get another contraction, and grab the rider until it passed. By that time they would last about 15seconds. It then took us about 25minutes to make it to the taxi stage, that normally took 10minutes. In Kampala our roads are glorious, the pot holes es will quicken your birth process.
Meanwhile at the back of my mind it was one of those false labor days and so the plan was actually a trip to the saloon, because my look was tired.
Me and mum left home with the plan of me going back to my personal place of residence which was closer to the hospital. And so we left with no plan of what was slowly but steadily unfolding, My becoming.
At the stage while me and mum were waiting to get on board public transport, I get another contraction, and she suggests maybe we go do a small check up to rule out the chances of a road side birth but she changed her mind immediately and says the checking may enhance my labor and we were not anywhere close to my hospital. Which was about 2hours away on a no traffic day. But knowing my beautiful country Uganda and our glorious roads that meant 4 hours. So we make the decision to purchase a mama kit for just in case and then we jump into a special hire car instead of public transport.
In the cab am still having plans of going to the saloon. I even call the saloon lady to book an appointment. My mum must have thought this girl is crazymad, because for her she was planning on how to get the baby stuff in one place. She had done the shopping for me but did not carry it home, it was in two different locations. She calls my sister Esther who starts making trips to collect the babies staff to bring to one place.
Most mums go through a nesting phase were they fold and pack the baby’s staff in preparation for there coming , I did not.
In the cab I started to realise the contractions were consistent and not stopping so I call my Doctor and explain my experience and she tells me to check-in so she could asses me.
That’s when it dawned on me that I was having a baby. My heart was in my mouth, I was not ready. I started to regret the morning prayer that I blamed for stimulating the process. I was terrified.
My mum jumped out in the city center to go buy other necessary things for the baby while I went across town to the hospital alone. We passed by my place to pick up a couple of staff I had got for the baby most were gifts from my beautiful friends that had thrown a shower for me a week before. Thank you girls.
While at mine my friend Florence joined me. We went to the hospital together and by the time we got there I was In phase one of crazy talk.
We check in and the gyn announced I was 4cm (that shit hurts like hell ) and in active labor.
While my mum and sister were running around getting the baby’s staff together, (I was so unprepared the clothes was not even ironed) I was in the company of three ladies. Joanna , Brenda and Florence. They kept chatting me up while I was lost in my thoughts of how the hell does a human being come out from between my legs. If checking my cervix hurt like hell what about a whole human being?
As I did the walking around,while drinking black tea that made me vomit each time I took some alongside getting traumatised with each contraction, I stopped crazy talk and started to pray like Hannah in the Bible. I have never prayed so hard in my life. Desperacy will create fervency for results.
I hit those walls while speaking in tongues and commanded everyone around me to pray or get out. My sister and Brenda took turns doing the back rubs which at some point I wanted without ceasing. After 2 hours when the doctor came to do that check again, I remember asking him why he wanted to kill me.
He mentioned I was now 7cm and needed an extra 3cm so they could start the birthing process. He said it would take another 4 hours. Which I disagreed to.
I boldly said me and God agreed that I had 2 hours left. By this time the time between the contractions was like 30 seconds. and contractions would hold for close to 5 minutes. Those 30 seconds were life to me, they gave me hope. An hour later. There was no break. I had officially lost my mind. I couldn’t take any noise besides my praying one. All I wanted was the back rubs and silence. That listening to music technique was thrown out the window.
While I was experiencing this my mother, was around the corridors of the hospital, praying her heart out and terrified for her big baby. Mother I love you. No words can can articulate my gratitude for you.I AM BECAUSE YOU ARE.
Towards the last hour me and God agreed on. I told my baby girl now is the time. I got Holy water poured it in her passageway and commanded my water to break. five minutes later, I peed alooooooot and I think that’s when it broke. The pushing started right there in my private room, no instruction from the doctor. I kept telling Brenda and Esther to go get the doctor, but they thought it was just the pain making me talk. Even when they did go, the doctor told them I was just going through a phase.
Until Brenda took a look down there and saw the babies head.
Doctor came through, no time to transfer me to the delivery room. The pushing had to happen right there in my room. This part can not be described with words. The whole process took me 8 hours. From the first contraction I got from the morning walk.
December 4th 2019, 6:05pm. I became a mother.
To the mothers out there, your sacrifices are beyond understanding. You put your life and sanity at risk. And after all that, you love us, you nature us.
My words are finished.
Mummy I love you.
Happy mothers day 😇
Be kind, Be humble, spread love.