Beautiful Distress (Part 1)#Day20_of_22

I listened to this song this weekend and it brought back memories.(you can listen as you read)


He was a new student and wore a blue checked shirt and had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen.I remember this moment like it was yesterday.

One morning during my Term One S4, I was getting set for a commerce exam. I have always been a last minute reader because those final panic readings always worked for me.

That’s when I saw him right in the middle of my panic study, I can’t remember what happened after we locked eyes. The next thing I knew the supervisor came in and my neighbour slapped me out of the trance I had gone into.

I did not see him again that term,

I even forgot about the moment because I thought it was a dream. Those eyes only existed in fairy tales.

Term 2 came;

My life was that of a normal high school child, I belonged to the category of the almost none existent student. under the radar, low key, average grades and no male friends just small talk with the ones that sat next to me in class. It was my name that gave me away sometimes because it was Odd and unique.

TIKIA ALUDRIA J

My father also Aludria and a teacher at my school also told his students, if they wanted to date me they had to be straight A students in the science class. Word went around and thank God most could not put a face to the name. My name was famous, I was not.(i think so)

There was a secret rumor going around about some new comer who was head over heels in love with me. I found out through one of the boys that sat next to me.After my insisting he decided to give me a name and out of very innocent curiousty I wanted to see what he looked like and turned out he was in the same stream with my best friend.

I took a pee break from class, went to her window to give her the news and the name so she could point me in his direction.

Nothing ever readied me for what occurred next,

I saw those beautiful eyes again staring at me,piercing through my soul.

It all came back to me,Those strange things I felt when we I first saw him.

It was beautiful distress the moment;

Beautiful because I liked how his eyes sent a shudder down my spine and butterflies all over my body, the hair on my skin was standing.

Distress because the sensations were unusual for me to the point I could not feel my legs anymore, I panicked and so i hid under the window, crawled until I was out of his eye sight and run with the legs that couldn’t carry me anymore like my life depended on it.

Since then there was never a moment in time that I did not think about him.

My class was on the flat and his was on the new class block built next to the rear end of the flat, there was a spot on the stair case leading to the second floor through the wall frames, I was able to secretly stare at him everyday. He sat in the middle row at the back, always looking graceful and charming.

I made a habit of avoiding him running away like he was the plague because He always stared with no shame never looking away until I was out of sight and that always sent me into a panic. To flee was always my immediate solution. I even started talking to my friend through her window, because the time I tried to enter her class with Mr Smoky eyes in, his classic stunt of staring me down took my breath, I lost my footing, hit my knee on several desks because even my vision was bailing out on me before I finally made it to my besties seat, it was the longest most painful walk I’ve ever done. You would think ignoring him would work but I could feel his eyes on me all the time. I was stuck in that classroom even missed lunch because I could not get out unless he left, Thank God he stepped out because I was figuring out how to pass through the window or stay in that class for the afternoon session.

One day in my stalking spot I noticed he didn’t come to school and I remember he was away for three days and even though I was sad and missed him, some normalcy returned to my life, I no longer had to scan my routes to make sure I did not bump into him. I could go anywhere, anytime without any fear. I was free like a bird.

So the day he came back to school, I didn’t notice. I was busy enjoying my freedom. I walked into my friends class like a normal person. I was there for a short time and as I was midway through the lane leading to the exit, I sensed his presence turned my head to the middle row centre and that’s how I ended up walking right into a wall because for some reason I missed the door.

So many weird things happened to me that school year, I was on high alert all the time ready to bolt, I walked in awkward styles losing my footing most times. I run into many walls, hurt my knees, was always late for the Friday French class because they happened in his classroom and was occasionally trying to catch my breath. I started using perfume that year.

All the drama because I liked a boy who clearly with out a doubt liked me too.

But I was busy running away from the thing that I desired while all he did was stare and talk about it with his friends never daring to make a move or even send a note.

(That song always reminds me of Mr.Smoky Eyes who may or maynot be called Francis.)


Question: Ladies, how do you survive through those moment when your version of Mr.smoky eyes walks into the room?


Tomorrow, Is part 2 The day we finally spoke.

Till then,

Be kind, be humble, spread love.

39 comments

  1. This story is really funny 😂😂. I do remember one incident where I was seriously tongue-tied. I couldn’t get the words out yet I had things to say🤦🏿‍♀️ can’t believe the things you do when high on emotion.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ghal you have got me hooked. Unlike shy you back then don’t know about now but there was this wave of boldness that used to consume me and we would do this stare contest to see who would lose first. I used to tease the so called Mr. Smoky eyes in my life journey with my eyes and he had to fall fast in love yet most times it was a game for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I really really miss those days!!! I hardly ever had crushes on boys cos I was the tomboy of the class. But then there was this nerdy guy who constantly made me feel like maybe I really wasn’t one the boys 😂🤣😂🤣 butterflies, tongue twisting, oh Gosh!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It’s lovely to hear the version from a lady. Oh God, the male version is also hilarious. Yet you also experience these aha moments which sweep your feet off the ground. Otherwise, thanks for Story. I can’t tell the many times I froze just being near that one girl who who took away my emotions deep inside. It is a good recommendation I have gotten from JCA.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. What a funny story😂😂😂😂😂. You and me are on the same WhatsApp group. There’s a guy I was pretty much convinced liked me, and the only time that we felt closer to each other was when we went to the dining hall. He usually set two tables across me, and he would stare, I would blush 😂😂😂but he had a very cute gf in our stream…oooof😍that girl was way cute I stood no chance of trying to snatch him away from her😂😂😂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I had multiple smoky (ies) in highschool although i used to act tough. And yes, I started having minor upgrades- i asked for different perfumes, started paying attention to the little details like having pins on Sunday etc. I can’t wait for part 2.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Went through a single high school, experienced something like this at campus, i could fill his eyes pierce through my entire existence, we would lock eyes and smile before I knew it we were writing notes back and forth, then held hands, kissed and it ended as fast as it started.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Hahaaah you had me all vibes with song. This was well thought of post and bang…the storyteller in you should remain as is. Emotions can truly get the most out of us, only if those moments were recorded…they would have broken the internet😆😆😆

    Liked by 1 person

  9. This got me remembering the exact way I made people’s daughters stumble at the sight of me😂😂 ohhh dear, plus, I can relate to Mr Smoky, when boys discover that a girl likes them before they’ve even made a move, chances are they won’t say anything not until after a long time maybe. They’ll only probably brag about it to fulfill their ego and show the the other males how Alpha they are.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply to Lebogang Shazzygal Malatji Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s