To date i still struggle with how to begin 🤭.So let’s just start.
I have a guest.
I don’t know anyone yet that is able to Make God a madman.
Okay that is what I see in his book and it feels so right. God is a madman. But there is more to it. I will be posting my review of his mind blowing book Following The Madman next week. But if you want to see for yourself what I mean go and get yourself a copy on Kobo.com
I did a podcast on self doubt early this week and we talked about it. Doubt is not something he struggles with so I asked him to write about how he is able to not feel inadequate.
And he wrote;
Kevin On Self Doubt.
Tikia is one of those charming, wonderful and genuine people that spreads radiance wherever she goes.
I was greeted with that radiance the other day when she came up to me and asked me about self doubt. I told her that I didn’t suffer from self doubt. She then proceeded to ask me to write something on that for her blog.
Knowing how busy my schedule usually is, I was tempted to tell her that contrary to what I had earlier stated, I actually do have self doubt and in particular, I doubted my ability to write something for her.
However, I responded curtly that I would write something for her about it. Why did I give a response that was in discordance with my actual intention? Well, that is a habit that resulted from my first tip of how I battle with self doubt;
Take on challenges, ask questions later;
I personally find that I am more productive when stakes are a little higher.
Like I hinted on before, I am not immune to self-doubt. Heck, I doubt anyone is. But I know how to battle it.
I take on challenges because it helps me actually do stuff. A mixture of self-doubt, procrastination and writer’s block can be a recipe for nothing doing.
Take on challenges, deadlines, quality expectations, working with new or advanced teams. Those are opportunities for exponential growth. You can always recover later.
There’s obviously a limit to this. You don’twant to get your hands full. And always remember that it’s okay to declare that you have failed. Don’t quit to early though.
They say history doesn’t talk about quitters but the greatest historical epics are about those who kept trying and eventually made it. Brings me to my next tip.
Keep trying and try again
I sort of already got into this so let’s proceed to the next one;
Fear is in the mind
Self-doubt is mostly fear. Fear that it won’t work out, fear that people you know will judge you and that you aren’t good enough. At least compared to other people already doing it.
Well I can give you one assurance; whether it is trying out a new art form, public speaking, jumping into a new career, launching your career or business or even dating and asking someone out, taking step one is already more steps than the millions out there who are standing at the stairs fearing to climb up.
If that’s difficult to master, or even muster, try this;
Take a leap of faith, or get someone to shove you
Want to tag someone to your post but don’t know them personally. If your gut tells you its beneficial, do the two second rule; tag them and post in two seconds place your phone down or leave the phone altogether for some 10 minutes or so. Go out and buy chewing gum or something.
Do the same for that person you like. Type out that text and without much thought, send it, place the phone down, don’t delete, give your phone thirty minutes to settle down and come to terms with the fact that you finally spoke your heart.
Do the same with proposals, with career choices, with starting to write, v/blogging, tiktok and other art forms. Show yourself off. You don’tknow what will happen tomorrow.
Guys and I mean boys, have a tendency of snatching their friends’ phones playfully and texting their crushes in a manner that one would consider to be more upfront and with confidence.
It’s an interesting thing to watch. It’s almost like a disabled lad borrowing someone’s legs for a while.
What taking the leap does is that it accustoms you to taking risks. Thereafter, it helps you know where you actually stand. You’ll be shocked by the results.
Start with what you know
My lecturer used to say, ‘Start with micro, then macro.’ Want to be a professional musician (vocal and instrument)? Do you know how to sing? Join the choir. Then join a smaller group, maybe a band, eventually you’ll enter solo production where you could also learn to play instruments.
It might be a more difficult journey to start with piano lessons even when it’s advised. It’s a long process but you’d also fair better with having something like singing in hand before instruments.
Consistency is key
This motto is hard to explain. It’s like love songs. They hit differently when you have a crush or are in love. Same with this.
When you see the fruits of consistency, the opportunities that come up, the growth you experience and the learning, you’ll never be the same again. I can testify.
Just don’t stop, keep doing what you’re doing. Take breaks but recover quickly, like Tikia said in her podcast.
Embrace a go getter attitude, start small
Always find a way to stand out. Whether you are an introvert or not, there is always a way. You might not have sat in the front row in school but life offers multiple opportunities for that.
Standing out builds confidence. It can be in various simple forms. Joining a choir, deciding to lead the family or even workmates in an initiative, or even taking special classes, even when it’s unrelated.
Physical exercises for instance boost your sense of being.
Self explanatory. Train yourself or go for training. Don’t rely on it completely because life lessons in practice are the best but learn. A doctor is more confident when examining you not just because they are trained but also because they ‘know’ that they are trained.
Talk to people
And not just successful people, every one walking on the street is a moving repository of life skills and experiences. Develop a habit of picking people’s brains. It will clear some fears. Successful people will definitely have more to them but some are just lucky. Still, seek them out wherever you can and chat.
It’s hard to quantify how this helps, but it does. No matter what you believe or don’t believe in, understanding and declaring to yourself that you are here for a higher purpose and find channels to harness that, really eases the self doubt.
Whether it’s religious music or tapping into that ancient wisdom through books and teachings, you’re able to learn a lot on life’s potential.
Finally, remember that this life is all you have
I have a motto that I always try not to forget; If I can’t live these few years of existence the way I want to, then what’s the point of living at all.
This motto always beckons me to go and get what I want. It’s not always easy but that’s part of the adventure of life.
I’m glad to write this piece for Tikia. I have not written for a blog in a while and this felt great. Of course I couldn’t lay out all my techniques, I can’t remember all of them. These are all I could remember. 20% of the battle against self-doubt also involves winging it, being flexible to change and working with what’s on hand.
I still struggle with self-doubt but I thought I would share some strategies I employ to fight it.
If you have some strategies of your own, please feel free to share.
Only posterity will tell how how powerful Tikia’s podcast will be. For now I find that it’s a pretty good message for people who need someone to relate to while battling hardships.
Check it out self doubt maybe a good thing on :Google podcasts / Spotify /Anchor Fm
Much love y’all
Mukama Kevin Rushokye
I would like to add on to spirituality. (Because it’s my niche 😇 and I just want to say the name Jesus) Personally before all things Being grounded in Christ has helped me stay afloat. Faith is able to help you overcome fear. Faith will give you the courage to walk into the valley of the shadow of death and stay sane.
Faith is the key to living a purposeful life.
We’ve come to the end of an amazing story.
Happy new month by the way. May it come with clarity , blessing,peace and joy. And no carryover. Whatever was meant to be achieved and done this year shall come to pass in the sweet name of Jesus. Amen.
Until next time
Be kind, Be humble, spread love.