To The Girl that has disappointed the world.

Hello there🙂.

Finally a draft is being released. I wrote this after someone rained judgment on me this year because of my bad decisions. I can’t seem to remember what exactly they said because I don’t hang on to those things for so long. But I remember feeling like I was the biggest disappointment in that moment.

I don’t mind being called out on my mistakes. However There is a big difference between judgement and correction. Some people don’t know where to draw the line.

I pride in knowing I have learned to own my garbage and work towards being better. No need for name calling. That shit cuts deeps.

So here is a letter to the girl that feels like she has disappointed the world.


Dear beloved,

I know that life has not been kind to you. You have been betrayed by the people that were supposed to protect you.

They did and said things to you. Things you did not deserve to hear or experience.

Now some if not most of these things have shaped who you are today. They have influenced the decisions you made and continue to make.

Trust, love and kindness are things foreign to you. You would never know how to receive it even when it comes your way.

Everytime you tried you ended up disappointing the few good people in your life.

So you turned into a people pleaser. Always giving.

Your cup run dry and they judged you. They called you a pretender.It hurt so bad. But you continue to give from an empty cup.As long as they are happy. You feel secure, like you belong.

But when you go to bed at night You can’t help but wonder how life would be if you took that trip you’ve always dreamed of or if you left that job, friendship, lover, church, family would you find joy?

So many possibilities.

And then fear creeps in.

You lay awake and yet not.

Empty.

Finally sleep takes you. You wake up in the morning and continue the pattern.

My word to you is to Take that leap of faith cut that person off.Do that one thing you have always thought of doing. No risk no gain. (As long as it’s not toxic, don’t go crazy like that) Also You can never out please this world. It’s a messed up place. They will still judge you. And I am speaking from experience.

We turn into different things based on the burdens life decided to serve us.

Another Girl becomes the thing she fears the most, the thing that broke her.

She is okay with being the rogue.Its all she knows. In fact she prides in being the Bad girl. And so she passes on the pain.

Another girl will focus on her career, another will become the good wife, another will find refuge in God (ignorantly). So many other things she will become.

But she is all this with pain.

With a deep wound, she has covered up with band aid, but it keeps bleeding.

And the world will judge her the moment she breaks. So has decided to keep up appearances.

I know a girl,

The girl was born in a love-less home. All she knows is obedience.

She did everything they asked and never questioned.

She doesn’t know what love is. She is lucky to get an education. She is sent off to the university. All of a sudden a boy says she beautiful, he buys her gifts and she is overwhelmed. She gives herself because that is all she knows to give. She gets pregnant and when she decides to keep the baby. If the boy stays she is lucky, if he runs she is called a prostitute.

One of these girls decides to do an abortion and she is scarred for life.

Another died doing an unsafe abortion.

The one that was left to fend for herself passes on the sadness to the baby and the cycle continues.

I pray for this girl too.

For all the love you did not receive. I am sorry. The world that deems you invalid. They don’t know your story. Forgive them.

The light skinned girl. You are focused. You toiled and went through the education system. You landed a good job. Worked through the system and got promoted on merit. You have your money, dream car, dream house. And All we see is your skin colour. We believe your skin color got you the success. You hurt that no one notices the hard work you have invested.

Dear light skinned girl I am sorry we judge you for being beautiful. I pray for you.

And to the girl I have not mentioned today,

All the paper will not contain our stories.

But I pray for you.

I pray that you find meaning in this life. I pray that you hear the voice of God when he calls. In my opinion he is the only one whose opinion should matter.

I pray that you don’t stay in that pit too long. It’s never too late to pick yourself up and focus on what matters. That mistake doesn’t define you. It’s only a steeping stone to greatness. It’s your story to tell as well. And i pray you find the right people to pick you up when you fall. We all need somebody.

And remember this world is to big for you to carry on your shoulders. Just find the authentic you and be that person. It’s going to be hard. You will make those mistakes, you will disappoint many. But that’s the price to pay for being yourself. Not everyone will agree.

Note that you can only be a victim of circumstance for so long. No one is going to pick you up if you don’t make that decision to be the queen that you are..

And to the world that judges please be kind. You have no idea the weight she carries. There is a time for everything. Pick your words and actions wisely.

With Love,

Tikia with Grace


I swear it’s all the NF real music I am taking in that’s making me talk like this.😁

He inspired today’s post. By saying in one of his songs. (I own my garbage) look out for Real by Nf. Thank me later.

Anyway I hope I have made someone feel better. We are not carrying any negative opinion into the next year.

Tomorrow it’s the weight he carries.

It’s Day 10 of 12.

Question: what is the most judgemental thing someone has said to you this year.? Let’s leave it in the comments and forgive these people.

Until tomorrow.

IoBe kind, be humble, spread love.

Photo credit: pexels

15 thoughts on “To The Girl that has disappointed the world.

  1. Thanks Tikia for this, when it comes to judgment I want to say that people should stop judging people for not getting married or having kids and vice-versa. Those things are personal.

    Recently my freind was judged yet she is battling with infertility 😭

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I was told that I decided to keep my pregnancy just to trap a man. And when me and Mr decided to go our separate ways before baby was born, I was told that I had lied about the baby daddy.

    This world will try to hurt you in anyway, but once you believe in oneself, nothing can break you

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Strength to you.
      I was told I wasn’t raised right and could not keep a man. And that’s why the baby daddy left me.. But like you say being self-aware protects you from the worlds opinion.

      Like

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